everything atkins forums

Been there, done that, sold the t-shirt.

Here's my story and I pray you learn from it (I never seem to).

I was at 213lbs when I got back on Atkins in April. Lost 40lbs by Aug and by Oct I was tired of the loose some gain some (because I was getting lax) and was having a hard time working it. At Thanksgiving I decided to hell with it all (oh man, I hate when I do that) and told myself to FINALLY enjoy the holidays without being stupid (yeah, right).

I was so disgusted with myself I went back on Atkins the Monday after Xmas - didnt even wait for the New Yrs thingy. 5 weeks I was on it before I lost 2 lbs and 2 weeks later I decided my body just wasnt going to let Atkins work so I went off and figured I could come up with SOME way to loose the 20lbs I gained (the folks that say diets dont work because everyone gains the weight after getting off - well DUH. I dont have just one ice cream cone - I have 2. I dont just have 3 cookies I have an entire row ... of course it doesnt work, cause when I go off, I GO OFF).

I tried portion control, watching my fat intake, Alli, went to the Drs and got pills that kept me from eating - and sleeping, cried, ate, and gained the rest of the 20lbs I'd lost.

I'm a fool - my own worst enemy. Why? Because I know the answers and still talk myself out of or into ... whatever. Want examples? (tell me how many of these you have told yourself) ... It's the weekend; a friend/company/family is coming over, I'll get back on it Monday. Dammit Jennifer, everyone says if you withhold yourself from having something you truly want you'll just splurge later, so eat it now and get it over with (then I splurge anyway - why not I tell myself, I already messed up). If I am going to do this diet right I need to get rid of the junk I have so it wont tempt me - so I eat it, all of it. It's my/his/her/their ______ (fill in the blank with birthday, anniversary, vacation, etc) - to hell with it.

Okay - you get the clue - I do this every time - every. fricken. time. I KNOW and I STILL do it. And I probably will again.

The rolls on my back are showing. My fat clothes are all I can fit into - hell, they're even tight and the slightly slimmer pants are shorter because of my backside and thighs. I've wasted more money to get pants that fit because I have a job now and cant get away with wearing sweats that didnt make me feel like I'd gained weight - so the lie is out and I'm sick of myself and the scale.

Now here's my question to those of you who are frustrated - if you're anything like me it wont work - but I am hoping you arent anything like me: Don't you remember that anger? The frustration? That pissed off at the world because you're gaining weight? ... Wait; that's not it ... because you are FAT.

Why the hell do you want to go through that again? Why do I?

Don't do it! Please; just say no.

Work it (Atkins) - write journals of your moods, get into the bathtub with a book when the cravings hit - go for a walk, talk to a friend. Dont put yourself through this - again. Please.

_________________
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
— Thomas Paine

Jennifer (220/210/160)5' 7.5" ... 46 yrs old
(restarted 1st Jan, '11)

Courageous and helpful post, Jennifer, and very timely for me.

I've been through the cycle before--lost 40 pounds (with the help of this board) in 2003/2004, only to stall out when I got to the 40 pound mark and find myself unable to lose another ounce. I gradually lost focus and after an additional year of trying to lose, went off plan and gained every bit back.

Last June, I started again, focused very hard, and by mid-December, had once again lost forty pounds. You guessed it. The losses stopped cold, and I am still trying to figure out a way to start losing again.

I keep getting discouraged and finding I've gained back 3 pounds, and working hard to lose it again, only to get weary and discouraged a few weeks later and re-gain it. I am at a VERY DANGEROUS place. I can't seem to lose any more (and no, I am not at goal. To be a normal weight on the charts and not in the overweight category, I clearly need to lose 15 more pounds.) And yet I am not easily and comfortably maintaining the weight I have managed to lose. I have to continually struggle not to gain it back.

But your post gave me renewed commitment to fighting to keep off what I have lost, and to find an answer to why I cannot lose more.

Thank you for writing it.

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Jessica
Low-carbing since 6-21-09
Simeon's Protocol
Loading 7/11-12, total lost: 24.6 pounds so far! (224/170.4/165)

Thank you, Jennifer for that wonderful post. I am sure many of us could have written the same thing. I started at 214 pounds and lost 60 pounds. I have gained back 10 and so far have been wise enough to not let it go any farther. But I too am frustrated and am loosing and gaining the same 3 or 4 pounds over and over. I am short so that 10 pounds really makes a difference in my clothes and looks. I really want to get it back off and few more too. I know how to do it. So why don't I just get it done?? I am old and as I look back on my life the one thing I would change, if I could change anything, is to keep my body slim. Loosing weight when you are past your prime is just going to leave you with wrinkles and extra skin. Do it while you are young. Don't waste your life being fat. IMHO

That's an awesome if very sad post Jennifer. My heart goes out to all of you in this predicament.

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Jim M 62 6'1 336/183/183 153 lbs GONE!
Started Monday 23rd June 2002
Maintenance

Because you can read this, thank a teacher. Because it's in English, thank a soldier.

Thanks for writing Jennifer.

I started at 204 years ago and lost down into the 180's. So far I have maintained that because if the scale hits 190, I get scared.

But it's still frustrating to get to 182, which seems to be a set point for my body and just sit there...even on 10 carbs a day. I can go for weeks at 10 carbs a day and still not lose anything. How is that possible?

Anyhooo...I hope you can work it in a way that you can live with. I'm still trying to find mine!

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Donna
5'4", 52 years old
204/184.6/175ish

Thank you folks. I had to come clean and be honest. It's not easy doing this - no matter how well I know it works, if it's not working (even if I am not working it) I loose the willpower - and sitting where I am now just makes it suck - so I am hoping, if I can get down to what I was and stall that I will have this post to remind me of the BS I put myself through and how it's so not worth it.

_________________
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
— Thomas Paine

Jennifer (220/210/160)5' 7.5" ... 46 yrs old
(restarted 1st Jan, '11)

I am right there with you as many of us are. I lost 65 and to date have gained 20 of that back. This is somewhere i swore I would never be again. I have restarted Aktins about 20 times in the last few months, I too went to get the pills from my dr. and didn't take those religeously either. I came on here tonight because i was doing well and eating clean and then it was my mom's birthday and we went to lunch where i chose items as close to plan as possible but afterwords they got ice cream, I had 1 nibble and it all went haywire I am pretty sure I ate half a carton of ice cream by myself. I have no clue why i did this, but the reality is is that I did. I started over again this morning and stuck to plan, I was even invited over for spagetti tonight and I took my crab salad with sugar free dressing with me instead. So I am feeling a little better, but need to stick to plan.
I came on tonight really to lurk and search for motivation and your post caught my eye and thank you for being candid and open. We all have, are, or will struggle with fight our old habits and that is just part of it.
I think what I might do is go to the store and carry around 20 lbs or better yet 65 so i can remember where I was and realize how much that can affect me not only in looks but in what I am doing to my joints and everything else.
My true moment of truth though was because i gain weight in my stomach when i am off plan it tends to hang off of my body and I went somewhere with my friend and we decided to run across the street and i could hear my stomach smacking my legs and then my friend looked at me like what is that? she tried to play it off but i had already seen the look. I am pretty disgusted with myself right now and the worst part is that when i feel this way it makes it harder to stick to plan. Today i went swimsuit shopping and the ones that help hold in your tummy were almost $100.00 I refuse to pay that. I hate that I can't wear cute summer clothing and I don't even care about wearing a bikin anymore but to not wear the swimsuits i already have is pretty ridiculous. I refuse to buy bigger clothing and luckily dresses are a bit more forgiving, but I can no longer allow this to go on and I truly thank you for your post as it is allowing me to vent what i have been feeling and i actually am feeling better.

_________________
Marci
SW 235 10lbs lost on induction
180 hit on 11-29-05
183 Hit on 10-22-05
stgw 200 hit on 8-13-04
01/2011 Sadly back to 215
ltgw 165
lltgw 155
I AM A SUCCESS STORY AND
I WILL NOT BE ONE OF THE STATISTICS!!!

Thanks Marci.

I need in your face conversations. I love the encouragment this forum gives - but when someone is sliding, a pat on the back and encouragment isnt enough.

What I give is what I need back.

I'm on Induction and I ate a handful of nuts tonight - idiot. Worse, I ate some new kinda SF chocolate Friday and it was good - dagnabit.

I've lost 3lbs this week and I am happy. I will be happier when I get smarter and eat smarter - it's a start, but I know I am better than this.

_________________
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
— Thomas Paine

Jennifer (220/210/160)5' 7.5" ... 46 yrs old
(restarted 1st Jan, '11)

Well we didn't gain the weight the first time by eating right and it will be a constant issue and we will always need to remind ourselves oops can't eat that. We have to relearn every day. The sad part is that 2 years ago this was my way of life and i made good choices and somewhere i lost my way. I guess the bright side is better nuts than candy or is that the thought process that got me where i am now? Who knows. I was actually good today so 2 days in a row.
so Since both of us are in this predicament how can we hold each other accountable or encourage each other? Are you a competetive person? DO you like to be pushed or do you need kudos (verbal not the candy) I am competetive and hate to lose (I am not a good loser except for weightloss) or would this even help you?
I have decided to write down EVERYTHING I eat for 2 reasons, I need to make sure that I am getting the right amounts in but also it keeps it in the forefront of my mind and i am not eating something out of habit. If you want we can do this for the next 2 weeks and post our meals. We may need to do that next week though because i will be out of town as of Thursday but that gives us a week to get into the habit. What do you think?

_________________
Marci
SW 235 10lbs lost on induction
180 hit on 11-29-05
183 Hit on 10-22-05
stgw 200 hit on 8-13-04
01/2011 Sadly back to 215
ltgw 165
lltgw 155
I AM A SUCCESS STORY AND
I WILL NOT BE ONE OF THE STATISTICS!!!

What I need is to be locked in a cage and hand fed, only let out by a 6'2", black haired, green eyed, tan all year round and body built for two personal trainer - and his twin Atkins cheif in my kitchen.

I stalled by eating almonds instead of candy - SF ice cream instead of reg. - and so on. I have the "try" in me - just not the "umph" to be triumphant in this WOE.

I hate loosing too, but only the scale keeps me on plan right now.

I should write my meals down to see what others think - I'll see what I can do.

_________________
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
— Thomas Paine

Jennifer (220/210/160)5' 7.5" ... 46 yrs old
(restarted 1st Jan, '11)

Jennifer, why don't you post on the "What are we eating" Thread love.

_________________
Jim M 62 6'1 336/183/183 153 lbs GONE!
Started Monday 23rd June 2002
Maintenance

Because you can read this, thank a teacher. Because it's in English, thank a soldier.

Jim - cause I'm lazy.

_________________
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
— Thomas Paine

Jennifer (220/210/160)5' 7.5" ... 46 yrs old
(restarted 1st Jan, '11)

at Jennifer.

_________________
Carolee

234/234/150 5'10" , 45 years old
Start Date 11/13/11

LOL indeed.

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Jim M 62 6'1 336/183/183 153 lbs GONE!
Started Monday 23rd June 2002
Maintenance

Because you can read this, thank a teacher. Because it's in English, thank a soldier.

This is such a great post....

and I can definately empathise...as I have done - am doing it too!

It is almost like I lose a few lbs then I sabotage myself - maybe I have mental issues....lol
I have been overweight all my life that I do not know what it feels like to be thin. And I believe that is another issue I have..getting my mind over that hurdle....It is shame that I have come so far in life only to realise this now...

I have to admit, it is harder now (having the 3 young kids) - it is just easier to have a sandwich for lunch the to prepare a salad!

But, if nothing else this forum is a great motivator...I am frustrated too!

_________________
From Delilah7767

Restarted Atkins: 1st August 2011 (107kgs)
Current Weight: 103kgs

111/103/65kgs (original goal)

Mother of 3 beautiful kids
Stephanie - 6 years
Angus - 3.5 yrs
Phoebe - 2 years